Battle Royale: Look, Ma, No Hands!

Not a PSD. The guy on the left is just using one of those nifty new Velcro® shotgun belts. They’re all the rage with Tea Party attendees of Presidential campaign speeches. 

I know, I know.  There’s no hand gripping the shotgun.  What I can’t take my eyes off of, though, is what the girl is holding.  Is it just me, or is anyone else imagining Billy Bob Thornton in a lacy skirt?

“I picked up a Kaiser blade that was a-layin’ there by the screen door — some folks calls it a sling blade, I call it a Kaiser blade… French-fried ‘taters with mustard… mm-hm!”

Thanks Michael. You can see a larger version and the original on Amazon.

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  • LtPowers

    She’s not holding a weapon, either; it’s kinda levitating near her palm.

  • Cropper

    It’s one of those fancy holsters like Steve McQueen had in Wanted Dead or Alive

  • Bev

    Can I give you a hand with that machine gun?  Please?

  • Prad69

    In case you hadn’t heard, no violence occurred at any Tea Party rallies. The assaults, thefts and rapes occurred at Occupy gatherings.

    • Luckysnags

      Yeah, but they were left-wing assaults, thefts and rapes by 99%ers , so it’s all excusable. And it probably wasn’t “rape-rape”.

  • Jshook

    “They’re all the rage with Tea Party attendees of Presidential campaign speeches. ”

    OK, you’re just doing this on purpose. Here we go again.

    • Chewbacca

      it’s his sad attempt to appear edgy
      kind of pathetic

  • Stella

    I don’t know which one I feel more sorry for — the guy whose missing a hand and apparently has somehow become so magnetized that weaponry attaches itself to him – or the girl with calves as big as her thighs and hands like a mannequin. 

  • Colbysmycat

    Hmm – sounds like someone is drinking the Kool-Aid – Tea Party rallies are oen of the few places I have felt totally safe in a crowd! Not even a hint of violence. Just an FYI.

  • kleenex

    What do you expect in a no holds bard battle royale??? people that look perfect???

  • Skizz

    “Is that a gun in your pocket? or are you… Ah, no, it’s just a shotgun stuck in your zipper!”

  • Noah Hopson-Walker

    She’s holding a kama, which is essentially the Japanese equivalent of a sickle.  A Kaiser Blade / Sling Blade is much bigger, looks different, and is used for other types of work.  From the looks of the picture they may have also mangled the kama, though it might just be a style I’m unfamiliar with.

  • Caseydubs

    haha! defnitely a disaster!  like the sling blade ref too. love that movie!

  • Waldobaby

    If I were to actually imagine Billy bob in a frilly skirt, I’d feel the need to ask Johnny Walker to help me forget.

  • Lightstriker Stormyhahaha

    Whats with the glowing neckties? Its not sci-fi. If you don’t know how to market it don’t import it with Westernized Edginess.

    Buy the graphics novel. The art is great, the writing and pacing is intense.

    • Amazing_G

      Those are glow lights in their tracheotomy holes; quite fashionable.

    • Lightstriker Stormyhahaha

      I remember now. Those are explosive collars. If they don’t kill each other by a certian time or leave the parameter their heads get blown off.

    • Alice K.

      Movie and graphic novel are both horrible. Read the original novel.

  • CragAntler

    Is this site Photoshop Disasters or Crossfire?  Geez, it’s just a goof.  Can we just make fun of the disasters please, and leave the staff alone?